Boy do I miss college....
1) The One Who Is Eager to Impress the Brothers. This girl is probably a) drunker than she planned on being when she and her friends cracked open that bottle of raspberry vodka in their dorm-room earlier and b) a freshman. She will drink anything you hand her at an admirable clip. She will also comply with naked-lap rules in beer pong, even if you make them up mid-game.
2) The DFMO Queen As in, Dance Floor Makeout Queen. She’s usually very shy, at least until the moment she grabs your face and starts to explore the inside of your mouth with her tongue.
3) The Senior Girl Who Complains About All the Underclassmen Girls. “Ugh,” she begins, rolling her eyes as another group of hard-bodied 18 year-olds she’s never seen before pours through the door.
4) The One Who Keeps Playing the Same Bad Song Over and Over. We get it, you love 'Adele.'
5) The Flip-Cup Virtuoso. This one defies logic. She’s so obliterated that she has to stabilize herself against the table with both hands to keep from toppling over. And yet every time the flip-cup game calls upon her (usually she doesn’t know it’s her turn until a male teammate starts to literally scream her name), she enters this state of Jordan-esque Zen and sticks the cup to the table as if there were magnets on the rim.
6) The One Who Appears a Little More Doable with Each Beer You Consume. When your buddy first points her out and says, “That chick totally wants you,” you respond that she “ugly.” By beer number five she is “not as bad as (you) first thought.”
7) The Weedhead Girl. The great thing about that rare gem of a girl who straight up loves herb is that it’s easy to lure her back to your room.
8) The One Who Hates Her Daddy. Your buddy Sully says, “The one I was with had a birthmark on her shoulder, but it was no big deal. She was SEXY.” Then Tito chimes in with, “Hey, mine had a birthmark on her shoulder too!” “Mine too!” you exclaim. Then everyone goes silent. Real silent.
9) The Smokeshow with an Attitude. She's hot and she knows it. And she has the worst attitude ever


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