Dear Abby,

My boyfriend brings up his ex a lot. The topic varies. Sometimes he talks about the negative things and sometimes he brings up nice memories they had. Either way, I'm not too thrilled about hearing about her. Does he still want her?

Say What in The Valley

Dear Say What,

I never would have believed it, but I read somewhere that if your boyfriend/girlfriend continues to talk about their ex, it's actually a positive sign. I'm as shocked as you are! Apparently, your boyfriend feels that you are confident enough to hear about her and he feels comfortable letting you know whatever is on his mind, even if it is his ex. He might be telling you the negative parts of their old relationship so that you two don't make the same mistakes, and maybe he brings up the good parts so that you are determined to make a better memory than that. No worries, maybe if he starts saying stuff like, "why can't you be more like her?", then I'd worry. However, if you really can't stand him talking about her anymore, make sure you tell him your thoughts and if he doesn't stop, there might be a bigger issue at hand.