Dear Abby,

My girlfriend of 3 months got me a present for Christmas that I don't like...in fact, she got me nothing I wanted.  I am an outdoors guy and I wanted various things from Gander Mountain for hunting and ice fishing...the presents she gave me had nothing to do with ice fishing and hunting. She bought me sweaters and jeans from high priced stores and cologne that I can't even pronounce.  It's not that I'm not thankful, but I feel like she's trying to change me to better suit her.  She dresses well and likes to spend money on clothes and stuff and I am the opposite.  How do I tell her I'm thankful for her presents, but they just aren't me?

Stressed in Chilton

Dear Stressed,

Ok, I have BEEN your girlfriend before.  She isn't trying to change you, she might be trying to change what you're used to for presents.  Maybe she thought you'd appreciate a different taste of society and wanted to amp up your wardrobe, I don't think she meant any harm. However, if she did give you this stuff with the only intention of changing you, then we have a problem.  If you feel hurt, sit her down nicely and bring it up, but don't bring up your presents.  She'll just get hurt.  Be thankful that she likes you enough to buy you nice things.  You know her better than me...just let her know that you feel she is changing you in your own way, but don't be angry about it.  Be sweet and let her know that you're not mad, but a little hurt. If she really cares about you, she'll stop trying to change you into someone you're not, if she gets all upset about it, then you ended something that wasn't going anywhere anyway.  Good luck!