I have been having a great time watching the Olympics. There has been some jubilation and some heartbreak for our American Olympians. 28 medals so far..that 13 more than we were supposed to win. I thought Gary D. Amato of the Milwaukee Journal Sentinal said it best:
Canada tried to "Own the Podium" but found out it cost a lot more than $110 million.
Germany brought its bobsled team, which hasn't lost since the Third Reich, or maybe the Second.
Norway brought its cross-country skiers, who are placed on teeny-tiny skis when they're 10 months old, tossed gently into the snow and told to schuss for their supper.
The Netherlands brought Sven Kramer and, unfortunately, Gerard Kemkers.
Despite its formidable winter foes, the United States is kicking more butt than a mule skinner at the XXI Olympic Winter Games. We own more hardware than Ace. We even beat Canada at its own game the other day when goalie Ryan Miller hid a puck magnet in his glove.
With four days of competition left, Americans have won 28 medals, which leads the medal count and is a U.S. record on foreign soil - though that might be a stretch, because you can almost see Seattle from here. It can't really be an international Olympics when the hosts speak Sheboygan English.
This is the rare Olympics when the U.S. stars actually have lived up to NBC's hype-meisters. Lindsey Vonn, Apolo Anton Ohno and Shaun White all followed the script. Bode Miller decided he liked the Olympics, after all, and hit the trifecta: bronze, silver and gold. Evan Lysacek exposed Russian figure skating legend Evgeni Plushenko as a whiny brat.
Even Johnny Spillane - a name straight out of central casting - got in on the act with a silver medal in Nordic combined. That's the sport in which you mogul down a ski hill, wind around some slalom gates, get some amplitude and finish with a Double McTwist 1260. Or something like that.
And, dude, our snowboarders are schwank! They've been bangin' sick tricks, cutting the pow pow and chillaxing. Translation: They're winning medals.
Thank goodness the International Olympic Committee added some X Games sports to spice up the Winter Games. If the IOC adds EA Sports, we'll dominate them, too, because nobody can match American teens thumb for thumb, except maybe the Japanese. America rocks Xbox.
This is shaping up to be a big-time medal haul for the US of A. The last time America led the medal count at the Winter Olympics - in fact, the only time - was way back in 1932, when Dick Button had not yet been invented and Stephen Colbert was a gleam in U.S. Speedskating's eye.
Back then, not a single athlete tweeted or used performance-enhancing drugs (unless you count Vodka) and all the sports were held outside, even figure skating. Nowadays, if they could find a way to get enough snow on Kilauea, they could hold the Winter Olympics in Hawaii.
The U.S. record for medals in a Winter Games is 34, set in 2002 in Salt Lake City. This team will come close to that total.
Germany is in second place with 24 medals, Norway has won 18, and Canada 15.
The Canadian government spent a lot of money on its "Own the Podium" program and its athletes, especially in speedskating, have underperformed. But 15 medals for a country that has more or less the same number of peopleas the combined metropolitan populations of New York City and Los Angeles is not bad.
Every state in the U.S. produces world-class athletes, but you don't find many athletes coming from the Northwest Territories. In fact, you don't find many people coming from the Northwest Territories.
Win or lose, the Canadians have been lovely hosts. If their men's hockey team does not win the gold medal, the national psyche will have to be institutionalized, but that's not our problem.
See, America is just good at winning. It's what we do. It's who we are. Give us a pair of skates or skis, point us toward snow and ice and we'll figure out a way to do it faster or better than everybody else.
In Norway, all they have is skiing. In the Netherlands, all they care about is skating. In Canada, hockey blots out the sun. And the Germans have their Werner Von Braun-designed bobsleds.
In America, we've got the NFL, the NBA, Major League Baseball and Danica Patrick. It's easy for us to take our eyes off the puck.
But show us a medal, and we'll show you the podium.